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Inspiring advice from the wife of Sh Ibn Uthaymeen

Our Islamic heritage is extraordinary. The scholars and teachers, students and seekers, and dā’īs and activists we have produced have left behind a legacy unmatched by any other academic or philosophical pursuit. It is testament to their commitment to their religion, their particularness with preserving narrations, and their implementation of what they learnt into their daily lives that we are able today to quote word for word thousands of aḥādīth of the Prophet (sall Allāhu ʿalayhi wa sallam) and thus preserve all his teachings.

What is often left unrecognised, however, is the support these great scholars received. We often overlook the importance of a supportive spouse and family who have made personal sacrifices for those involved in activism and Da’wah. The families, in particular the wives, work tirelessly without hope or desire for recognition from people. They support their families purely for the sake of Allāh (subḥānahu wa taʿālā), inshāAllah.

The following article is a transcribed interview conducted with Umm ʿAbdullāh, the wife of Shaykh Ibn ʿUthaymeen. It is a great question and answer session as it offers us a unique perspective of the everyday greatness that existed in his life. InshāAllāh, we can benefit from the Shaykh’s example as well as his wife’s, who is to be immensely respected for her role as one who helped the Shaykh in seeking and propagating such beneficial knowledge to the Ummah. One can also see the amazing respect and love she had for her husband.

As in this particular case, Shaykh Ibn ʿUthaymeen’s wife’s efforts were not known to the masses, and today, in such a materialistic, individualistic world, this would indicate a loss of some sort. However, in the sight of Allāh (subḥānahu wa taʿālā) it is even more beloved and it remains untainted with the slightest possibility of riyā (making a show of virtuousness).

Sisters whose husbands are involved in da’wah and teaching are especially advised to read this interview. As it is narrated that,

“Whoever guides someone to goodness will have a similar reward.”[1]

May Allāh (subḥānahu wa taʿālā) reward the efforts of those who work for the Dīn both publicly and in private.

Question 1: Was there any change in the motivation of the Shaykh regarding ‘ilm (knowledge), da’wah, and worship between his youth and his elder years?

Answer: I did not find any diminishing or weakness in his motivation in knowledge, da’wah, and worship despite his advancing age. On the contrary, his busy schedule continued to increase with time, as was the case with his worship and call, to the extent that during his intense illness, he was not negligent with one moment; he would spend every second in the remembrance of Allāh (subḥānahu wa taʿālā), worshipping Him, teaching, or directing.

Question 2: What did you see that was amazing in the Shaykh’s life?

Answer: His life was an example to follow, especially his patience and motivation to seek the knowledge as well as teach and disseminate it. Also, his piety was something that those who were not close to him may not have known about.

Question 3: How did the Shaykh interact with his children in their private lives?

Answer: His dealings with his sons and daughters fell into two stages:

First, in their childhood, he was keen on being close to them, taking care of them, raising some of the Islamic principles in them, and following their educational achievements. In addition, he made sure to direct, admonish, and incite them. For instance, he would sometimes take the children with him to the Masjid to perform some of the Fardh (obligatory) prayers. Also, he would encourage them to fast some of the days of Ramaḍān. Furthermore, he would incite them to memorise some of the short Sūrahs of the Qur’ān and reward them for it.

When the children reached youth and maturity, he was firm concerning fulfilment of religious obligations and in disciplining for cases of negligence; although he disciplined with direction and leniency. At certain times, he was not hesitant to do what was sufficient to change or correct their mistakes. In addition, he used to put full trust in them to do certain things so they could learn to depend upon themselves; he used to continuously encourage them to righteousness and keep a check on them regarding it.

Question 4: Why did the Shaykh not use henna on his beard?

Answer: Maybe he did not have the time to apply it. I think I heard him saying something to this effect.

Question 5: When did the Shaykh’s anger intensify, and how did he deal with your anger?

Answer: His anger used to intensify if the inviolable matters of Allāh were violated. Regarding my anger with the children, he would try to calm me down first, and then give the admonition to the one that was mistaken. In general, he was quiet and did not anger quickly; when he did, his anger would quickly dissipate, and this is from the favours of Allāh upon him, something I wished to also have.

Question 6: How did he get up from his sleep? Did he depend on an alarm clock, or would he ask someone to wake him?

Answer: He used to depend upon Allāh, then the alarm clock and then us. Usually, he awoke before the alarm, and before I would go to wake him up.

Question 7: Would the Shaykh ever go out with his family for a picnic?

Answer: Yes, the family used to have a weekly picnic on Fridays after Salāt al-Jumuʿah (the Friday prayer). We would go to an area in the wilderness close-by and bring our lunch. He utilised this time to share in some activities with the children, like foot-racing and solving puzzles. Also, he would bring a small rifle and compete with his children in aiming and shooting.

Question 8: How did the Shaykh fast during the year?

Answer: The Shaykh consistently fasted three days each month throughout his life. In addition, he would fast six days in Shawwal, the ten days of Dhul-Hijjah, and the day of ʿĀshūrā’.

Question 9: How did the Shaykh select the names of his children?

Answer: He used to choose names like ʿAbdullāh and ʿAbdur-Raḥmān; he left the rest for consultation amongst us. We would pick a name and present it to him; he would either agree or ask us to select another. These are the names of two of his sons.

Question 10: What were some of the things that would please the Shaykh?

Answer: There is no doubt that the Shaykh’s happiness used to increase whenever he saw the strength of Islām and Muslims.

Regarding happiness at home, it was manifested in meetings with his family and children. You would also see the signs of pleasure and happiness on him upon receiving his grandchildren. He used to open his cloak to allow them to enter underneath and then inquire about them a few times before reopening it; he would do this several times. Later, he would take them to his library where he kept a special kind of sweet which the kids used to call “halāwat abūyī” (my father’s sweets). We were keen to ensure that they would not find it, except with him. In addition, despite his busy schedule, he made sure to visit his grandchildren at their homes or in the hospital if any of them were ill; this would have a great influence on them and their patents.

Question 11: How many children did the Shaykh have?

Answer: The Shaykh had five sons and three daughters.

Question 12: Who amongst his children was the closest to his heart?

Answer: The Shaykh used to deal justly with his children in all affairs, major and minor. If he found any kind of distinction between them, he would never declare it openly because this is not from justice. If he was keen to be just in matters lighter than this, then what about such a matter?

Question 13: Who amongst his children was most affected by his death?

Answer: All of them were, and the reality of the matter is that I used to feel that we were not alone in this as he was a father to Muslims around the world, who all felt a great shock by his death.

Question 14: Who is his youngest child?

Answer: The youngest is a daughter who is 21 years old.

Question 15: What were the steps the Shaykh took in seeking knowledge, and what was your role in that?

Answer: The Shaykh began teaching in the Grand Mosque in ‘Unayzah following the death of his Shaykh, ʿAbd ar-Raḥmān b. Nāsir as-Sāʿdi even before I married him. At that time, he used to consider himself a student of knowledge.

Concerning my assistance, it was manifested in not distracting him from seeking knowledge and propagating it. I used to serve and make available to him what would support his efforts. I would also follow the children and take care of them, except in matters that required his notification so that he could direct, admonish, and seek a solution.

Question 16: How did he reconcile between the daw’ah, which took most of his time, and his familial and social responsibilities?

Answer: He used to organise his time and gave this great attention. For instance, he would dedicate time for teaching, fatwah (Islamic Verdicts), daw’ah (Calling to Allāh), worship, the family, the children, social responsibilities, and upholding the ties of kinship.

If he, at certain times, was unable to directly share in some of these responsibilities, he was still keen to share even by phone.

Question 17: What was his policy regarding educating and directing his children?

Answer: His policy was education; however, he did not force his children to seek a specialty, but instead used to consult with them regarding this decision. The obvious proof is that his children graduated from different types of colleges, some sharʿī (Islamic Jurisprudence and Law), others military, and also educational.

Question 18: Taking into consideration the Shaykh’s work and commitments, this inevitably led to him being away from home and the family. What was your role regarding this matter, and how did you cover for his absence?

Answer: Even if he was away from home whether for teaching and propagating inside ‘Unayzah or while travelling, he used to follow up on his children by phone calls and by checking on their affairs upon his return.

My role is not even worth mentioning because we always felt his presence with us. In general, I used to make the children feel their father’s responsibilities were great and his works many. As such, I would incite them to be patient with regards to that, and he used to compensate them on his return.

Question 19: Could you tell us about his worship at home?

Answer: He was keen to perform the as-Sunan ar-Rawātib (regular sunnah prayers), except in limited circumstances. He used to wake up in the latter part of the night as much as possible and then make the Witr before Fajr (the dawn prayer), in addition to the remembrances and istighfār (asking Allāh’s forgiveness) which he did not discontinue.

Question 20: What was his daily program? For example, when did he sleep and wake, and when did he eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner?

Answer: The Shaykh used to get up in the last third of the night, praying as much as Allāh wished and then he would make the Witr before the Adhān [call to prayer] of Fajr. Following the Adhān, he would pray the regular Sunnah of Fajr. Next, he would wake his family before going to perform Salāt al-Fajr (the dawn prayer) at the masjid. He would then return home to read his daily remembrances in the courtyard as well as some Qur’ān until about sunrise.

He would then sleep until about 8am. This was on the days that he was not teaching at the university. After waking again, he would eat some breakfast and then finish his work and readings in his study. He would also pray Salāt ad-Dhuhā before going to the Masjid for Salāt adh-Dhuhr. Upon his return, he would eat lunch with his family at about 1:30pm.

Next, he would take phone calls until about 20 minutes before ʿAsr. He would then rest for fifteen minutes or less before going to the Masjid to pray ʿAsr. He would return to his study after listening to people read (Islamic Texts) before going again to the Masjid for Maghrib and his daily classes that would last until ʿIshā’.

Usually he would return home after that to eat a light dinner before going to his study to either give lectures outside of the Kingdom via telelink or hold meetings. This was almost his regular schedule throughout most the year, although it would change during some seasons such as Ramaḍān, Ḥajj, and the summer break. There were also some weekly commitments, and these would take place either at home or outside. Some of his weekly commitments included: Wednesday night meetings with the judges, meetings with the Imāms (leaders of the masjid) that were scheduled to give the Khutbah (sermon) of Jumuʿah (Friday) in the Masājid, meetings with university staff and professors, and meetings with the people of Hisbah (those that enjoin what is right and forbid what is wrong) until 11 or 12 p.m. then he would go to sleep.

Question 21: What was his schedule during Ramaḍān, especially after iftār [opening the fast]?

Answer: During Ramaḍān, the Shaykh had a different schedule. He would spend most of his time at the Masjid reciting Qur’ān and meeting the needs of the people. Also, he would invite some of the students of knowledge and the poor to have Iftār (open their fast) at our home. After Salāt al-ʿIshā’, he would return home for dinner and to give Fatāwa (Islamic Verdicts) over the phone. In addition, many people would visit our house to either say salām (offer Islamic greetings) to the Shaykh or seek a fatwah (Islamic Verdict).

Question 22: Where did the Shaykh like to spend his rest time?

Answer: In reality, the Shaykh did not know (i.e. have) rest time; all of his time was busy. Even when he was sitting with us, the phone sometimes would ring, and he would spend a long time addressing the call. His rest time was in propagating the knowledge, meeting people’s needs, and fatwaā (Islamic Verdicts).

Question 23: How many hours a day did the Shaykh sleep?

Answer: The connected time did not exceed 3 to 4 hours. In total, it did not exceed 6 hours daily.

Question 24: Who amongst the students of the Shaykh did he praise, mention often and was pleased with their visits?

Answer: He looked the same upon all of his students. All of them were like his sons, and he did not praise any of them in particular, but he looked upon them equally when he would meet or welcome them to the house. Also, he would share in their special occasions, meetings, trips, or support them if they were in need of something.

Question 25: How did the Shaykh’s family deal with his asceticism and piety?

Answer: We used to see him as an example in all things, and we used to revere his asceticism and piety, which would comfort us since he did not like any unnatural mannerisms nor did he want that around him.

He was a simple person who liked ease in all of his matters.

Question 26: Did he cry upon the death of Shaykh ʿAbdul-‘Azīz b. Bāz?

Answer: He was greatly affected by the death of his Shaykh, from whom he took knowledge. Everyone around him felt the extent of the profound impact it had.

May Allāh make us meet them all in the Paradise of bliss.

Question 27: Did he travel for other than seeking knowledge?

Answer: No, he did not travel except to seek knowledge. He used to travel to Makkah for ʿUmrah (pilgrimage), where he would dedicate times for durūs (lessons) and lectures. In addition, he went to Riyādh and Ṭā’if to attend meetings of the Grand Scholars Committee.

Question 28: Can you tell us about the apparent generosity of the Shaykh with those in need?

Answer: We used to feel his care for the people in need, whether they were distant or close. For instance, he used to check on the affairs of his family and relatives that were in need. Also, he would do the same with his neighbours, helping them in all that they needed, comforting them concerning their worries, and sharing in their joyous occasions.

Question 29: What did you learn from the Shaykh? Did you learn matters of fatāwa (Islamic Verdicts)? Did you ever give fatāwa?

Answer: I learned from the Shaykh everything that relates to the affairs of this life, whether from the social or legal aspects.

Concerning giving fatāwa, I would not even dare to do this. I only used to present the questions I received to him and then relate the answers and fatawā to those that had asked.

Question 30: Before the Shaykh’s death, what did he admonish his household and beloved ones with?

Answer: The Shaykh did not give a specific direction before his death, but throughout his life, he would direct everyone to that which benefited them in their life and in their Dīn (religion).

Question 31: We would like an admonition from you to the wives of the Callers and Students of Knowledge.

Answer: They should preserve with their husbands, openly and secretly. In addition, they should prepare for them the best situations and conditions to continue providing their duties of da’wah and knowledge. Also, I incite them that they should not be bothered by the busy schedule of their husbands and their time spent travelling, seeking knowledge, reading, and doing da’wah.

By Allāh’s Will, they are sharing in the reward.

Question 32: Could you tell us about the way the Shaykh used to receive his guests?

Answer: He would receive his guests with simplicity and a real sense of welcoming. He ensured that they felt like guests, and no day passed, except that he brought a guest either for lunch, dinner or in between. We were pleased with his guests and would honour them.

Question 33: What about a rare and pleasing encounter he had with his children or neighbours?

Answer: The Shaykh acted with simplicity towards his children and neighbours and all those surrounding him. One such rare and pleasant occasion is when the Shaykh would record some short recitations of the Qur’ān and nasheeds for his children and sometimes in the presence of one of the neighbours’ kids. He then would re-play the cassette to them during some meeting with them at older ages. We even still keep some of these recording to this date.

Question 34: What is your advice to those that spread mischief in our Kingdom?

Answer: We ask Allāh to preserve our land and to continue to bestow upon us the favour of security and safety. The Shaykh would often repeat and mention that he does not know of any nation on the face of this earth that applies the Sharī’ah and holds to the correct creed like this one. Similarly, he used to incite us to deal with affairs using wisdom, good admonition, and leniency instead of resorting to violence.

Question 35: Is there anything that the Shaykh asked you to do that seemed strange and made you feel hesitant?

Answer: It may be unknown to most that I was illiterate and did not receive any kind of formal education. When I married the Shaykh, I was fully busy in his service and in providing him the correct, comfortable environment to seek knowledge and teach. After we had our children, I was busy with them, and it took all my time to raise them, in addition to the time I used to spend to help and support the Shaykh in seeking knowledge. After the children grew up and my responsibilities began to ease slightly, I was surprised that the Shaykh began to incite me to join the senior school i.e. for the elderly. Although hesitant at first, I decided to join. During this period, he followed my achievements and would not accept any of my sons signing my transcripts of record. He would say,

“I am the one to sign for all that relates to your academic achievements.”

This moment of learning is a period that cannot be forgotten by me due to its great, innumerable benefits.

Question 36: What kinds of gifts would the Shaykh give you, his children, and people in general?

Answer: During his lifetime, he would not withhold anything from those that were close and those that were distant, to the best of his ability. The greatest gift he used to give us was his da’wah (calling to Allāh) and duʿā’ (supplication). I ask Allāh to accept his duʿā’ (supplication), hold them for him in his good record, and bestow upon us the ability to be righteous after his death.

Question 37: Did the Shaykh relate to you anything nice that occurred in the masjid?

Answer: He would always mention to us those things that he thought were fit to mention.

Question 38: When did the Shaykh travelled for da’wah, how would you treat him concerning his leave?

Answer: I used to incite and encourage him as well as make things easy for him by providing him with that which he needed. In general, his trips were few, and I used to join him in most of them. Concerning travelling outside of the Kingdom, then he did not leave the country, except to seek treatment in America for ten days, and I joined him during that.

Question 39: Could you tell us about the Shaykh’s use of the internet when it was first introduced in the Kingdom?

Answer: He was one of the earliest to hasten to benefit from this service and tried to utilise it to disseminate, propagate, and serve the Islamic knowledge. There is nothing more evident of this than the establishment of his website, which contains most of his works. His site is currently supervised by the charitable organisation that was setup after his death.

Question 40: When did the Shaykh buy the automatic telephone answering machine?

Answer: From the things that are unknown to many is that the Shaykh was seen and had interest in modern electronic instruments. There were those that used to provide him with the newest technology, that is why we would often find that he had with him certain electronics that had not even as yet been released in the market at that time. Examples include: electronic watches, instruments that could determine the direction of the qiblah (direction towards the Ka’bah), audio recording devices, mobile phones, and automatic telephone answering machines, among many other gadgets. He acquired the automatic answering machine as soon as it became available in the Kingdom. He used it a great deal, often programming it and recording the messages himself, to the extent that when he would travel, he would leave a detailed message on how to contact him while he was away. In even this he was an example for us.

Question 41: Did the Shaykh buy newspapers and how did he learn about local and national news?

Answer: We used to receive one of the newspapers at our home as a gift, and he would look at it if he had the time. Sometimes he would ask us for scissors in order to extract important articles or news. Also, he would hear the news on the radio, especially during breakfast around 7 or 8 p.m. in the morning when he would listen to either the Qur’ān broadcasting from the Riyadh radio-station or he would listen to the BBC. In addition, he would at length sometimes listen to the news if there were important developments.

Source: www.islam21c.com

Interview conducted by Sister Maha bint Husein ash-Shammar & published in “Al-Mutamayyizah” Magazine Issue No. 45, Ramaḍān, 1427. Confirmed & Presented in English by Dr. Saleh As-Saleh. The interview was previously published on idealmuslimah.com.

Notes:

*The interview has been edited for readability.

[1] Muslim

About Ayshah Syed

Ayshah Syed studied English at Goldsmiths University of London, followed by a Masters in Comparative Literary Studies. During her years at university she became involved in da'wah, volunteering for various Islamic organisations. She has studied Arabic and works as an English-Spanish translator. She recently edited 'Meadows of the Divine: 40 Prophetic Traditions on the Virtues and Rulings of the Qur'an' by Sheikh Alomgir Ali, as well as other projects and publications for MRDF. She is currently working as Editor for Islam21c.

4 comments

  1. Zakariah Gold

    The first paragraph is a brilliant introduction into the strength of Islamic scholarship and sincerity. I myself have had the same insight and view regards the calibre of preserving Islamic knowledge and so it was great to see someone put those words and thoughts on paper.

  2. Taalib-ul-Hammuda

    May Allah (swt) make all of our wives like this!!! Ameen ameen !

  3. Mashallah its nice to see some advice directly related to daees and their wives and look at the routine of this busy man, an inspiration in his gentleness to his wife and family. Increasing knowledge shouldn’t increase harshness it should therefore make the person softer and slow to anger too.

  4. Mohammad Islam

    A very interesting interview. I wish I could sleep less and devote more time in studying. May Allah grant him and his family highest rank in Jannah. Ameen.

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